The One Where I Almost Had a Surprise Surgery This Tuesday

You will recall this week that the local hospital switched my father's records with someone else's, thus keeping him an extra 48 hrs because of this mistake.

More mayhem, totally unrelated:

Last night, my phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Linda?"

"Yes?"

"This is [the] Hospital. We're calling to pre-register you for your surgery Tuesday."

[Whoa! Back it up, Barkus!]

"No, I'm not having surgery Tuesday. Nothing's wrong with me."

Yes, I actually said that last phrase. After all, they can't see my shrinking head.

The hospital voice was not totally going for this.

"Are you Linda?"

"Yes, yes I am. Linda Crow."

"I didn't tell you your last name."

[Huh? Sorry I mentioned it?]

"Well, my name is Linda Crow. Is that who you want?"

"Is that spelled 'C-R-A-L-L?'"

"No. It's like the bird, 'C-R-O-W.'"

"Then you're not having surgery Tuesday?"

"Nope, I think I'm good. Thanks anyway."

"OK, Sorry."

Geez-Louise. Protect me from the local hospital!