Tiger and my other cousins.

Tiger, how is that "Cablasian" thing working out for ya? While you keep trying to work that "Cablasian" angle, certain folks will have no problem reminding your black ass that you are just another N*&&#r who happens to have a sweet golf swing. I know that you are probably the greatest golfer of all time, but now that you aren't smoking fools and going in the red on your score card come Sunday, folks are feeling more comfortable about calling you out.

"Is Tiger Woods another Mike Tyson?

Woods hasn't won a tournament since the scandal over his extramarital affairs that cost him his marriage, multiple corporate sponsorships and world's No. 1 ranking. Johnny Miller, lead golf analyst for NBC Sports, compared Woods' crash and burn to Tyson's during Golf Channel's first State of the Game Live special Friday night.

After winning the WBC heavyweight belt at age 20 in 1986, Iron Mike flamed out. He was divorced by wife Robin Givens and knocked out by Buster Douglas in 1990. Tyson was sentenced to prison for rape in 1992. He declared bankruptcy in 2003.

"It's a little bit like a Mike Tyson story to be honest with you," said Miller during the Golf Central special. "Sort of invincible, scared everybody, performed quickly under pressure. Until a Buster Douglas came along...His life crumbled. It's like Humpty Dumpty. He was on the high wall, way above all the other players, and had a great fall, and there's pieces all over the place trying to put them together." [Source]

Yes, that's the ticket Johnny; Tiger Woods and Mike Tyson. They have so much in common: One is a boxer, the other a golfer. One went to prison for rape. The other...wait.. Woods didn't rape anybody. Never mind.

Finally, if I told you that folks in a suburb of Detroit are up in arms because some...ahem, ahem, "city folks" are moving into their neighborhood, I bet you would think there goes whitey again trying to keep us out of their neighborhoods. You would think it, but you would be wrong. This little saga playing itself out in Southfield, Michigan happens to pit cousins against cousins.

"SOUTHFIELD, Mich. — Three years ago, Lamar Grace left Detroit for the suburb of Southfield. He got a good deal — a 3,000-square-foot colonial that once was worth $220,000. In foreclosure, he paid $109,000.

The neighbors were not pleased.

"They don't want to live next door to ghetto folks," he says.

That his neighbors are black, like Grace, is immaterial. Many in the black middle class moved out of Detroit and settled in the northern suburbs years ago; now, due to foreclosures, it is easy to buy or rent houses on the cheap here. The result has been a new, poorer wave of arrivals from the city, and growing tensions between established residents and the newcomers...

"There's a way in which they look down on people moving in from Detroit into houses they bought for much lower prices," says Grace, a 39-year-old telephone company analyst. "I understand you want to keep out the riffraff, but it's not my fault you paid $250,000 and I paid a buck."

The neighbors say there's more to it than that. People like John Clanton, a retired auto worker, say the new arrivals have brought behavior more common in the inner city — increased trash, adults and children on the streets at all times of the night, a disregard for others' property.

"During the summer months, I sat in the garage and at 3 o'clock in the morning you see them walking up and the down the streets on their cell phones talking," Clanton says. "They pull up (in cars) in the middle of the street, and they'll hold a conversation. You can't get in your driveway. You blow the horn and they look back at you and keep on talking. That's all Detroit." [More here]

Real talk. Some of my cousins can be...well, how do I say this? Not quite as considerate as they should be of their neighbors. I hear it from some of you Negroes right here in Philly when your less desirable cousins move into your neighborhoods. ----White folks, don't trip. I hear it from you as well. I know some white folks with homes at the "Jersey Shore", and they absolutely lose their minds if a "certain type "of white person buys (or rents) a shore home even on the same block with them. So this little issue seems to be color blind.

Still, to my friends in Southfield, all I can say is can't we all get along? Why don't you throw a big block party and invite all the neighbors. After barbecues and a brew or two, folks will open up and feel free to talk. At that point tell Pookie an em to try to be more considerate of their neighbors and then duck.