Hurricanes, white quarterbacks, and the evangelical candidate.

"Field, make sure you pick up a couple of cases of bottled water and snacks, and make sure you tap the ATM and get some cash. Oh, and don't forget to get some flashlights and batteries if you can..."

That's what part of my text from Mrs. Field looked like as the big gal upstairs prepared to hit you heathens on the East Coast with yet another rare natural disaster. This times it's of the hurricane variety. What will it be next, a meteor shower? WTF? Even the city that never sleeps is shutting down. These are strange days, indeed.

Irene is her name, and she is going to cost us some money.Heck she already started. This lady has expensive taste. Not even the Donald can afford this one. She might tear up his casinos in AC and some of his Manhattan high rises with one devastating swoop.

Speaking of strange, I see that ESPN the Magazine done went and made #7 white to make a point. [See pic with this post.] As is to be expected, some folks aren't pleased. But I have to give it to ESPN, they know how to sell magazines. Fire up those color arousal buttons and folks will talk. Talk leads  to curiosity, and curiosity leads to sales. And, let me say for the record, I can't even imagine Michael Vick as white. And if you knew how white folks feel about their pets  and vice versa, you couldn't either.

Finally, congrats to Governor Big Hair. I see that he is leading the republiclown field of presidential candidates. He does seem to be the "godliest" of all the candidates. Poor Mitt, he just doesn't have the right religion to satisfy that good ole republiclown base that is so full of true believers.

Governor Big Hair is the real deal among the republican bible reading base, and the main stream media is starting to take notice:

"That’s the mirror-mirror question for Republicans. Forget charisma, charm, intelligence, knowledge and that nuisance, “foreign policy experience.” The race of the moment concerns which candidate is the truest believer.

This was always a tough hurdle for Romney, whose Mormonism is reflexively distrusted by Southern evangelicals. Even so, in the absence of a better candidate, Romney had a fighting chance to win his party’s support. Then came Perry.

Talk about a perfect-storm, composite candidate. Combine Elmer Gantry’s nose for converts, Ronald Reagan’s folksy confidence and Sarah Palin’s disdain for the elites — and that dog hunts.

Perry doesn’t just believe, he evangelizes. He summons prayer meetings. He reads scripture while callers are on hold. Not incidentally, he’s a successful governor. Perhaps most important, he’s a wall-scaling fundraiser whose instincts make him a force of nature in the political landscape." [Source]

He is a force of nature alright, I am just glad that god created him. He might be the only one who can save us from these strange  times.

Doggie "diss"?

Did I just watch Justin Bieber pull a wicked a cross-over on Common in the NBA Celebrity All-Star Game? Noooo!

Anyway, if you are a fan of Lady O, you might want to skip this post.

A few weeks ago I listened to Michael Vick do an interview with local sports talk show host, Mike Missanelli. He was asked about his upcoming interview with Oprah and if he knew about the bet she had with Piers Morgan as to who would get an interview with him first. Vick assured Missanelli that Ms. O would win because he didn't even know who Morgan was.

Well Michael, you probably should have gone with Morgan. Seems Vick pulled out of his interview with Ms. O because she was going to ambush him by bringing a dog lover who adopted one of his dogs on her show. (I wonder if she told that to Vick's people? I doubt it.)
Of course Ms. O was not pleased about the last minute cancellation which left her scrambling to replace him, and folks in the know say you don't diss Ms. O. Well, I am sorry, but unless she plans to strap em up and play defensive end for an NFC East team this upcoming season (if they have one) I wouldn't worry too much about Ms. O.

"After careful consideration, I will need to postpone the taping of the Oprah Winfrey interview scheduled for February 22. I admire and respect Oprah and hope to be able to participate in an interview in the future..."

Good move Mike, your Mom will be pissed, but nothing good could have come from that interview. I don't know why you agreed to it in the first place. At the end of the day, Ms. O is going to pander to her dog loving fans, and I can just imagine how that ambush would have gone. Great television for Oprah, but it might have been career suicide for you. Poor pet owners confronting angry black man (who might be getting angrier with every minute) you get the picture.

Anyway, now it seems that Ms. O is upset, and she told the Hollywood Reporter that she prepared for months for the sit down and even did a field trip to Philly with her staff. (*Yawn*) Trust me, she will get over it. The money spent on that field trip is a drop in a very large bucket to Ms. O.

As an Eagles fan I am glad it didn't happen, and if the Eagles themselves stepped in and said don't do it I can't say that I blame them. They are about to give Mike 20 plus million and possibly more down the road. After his meltdown -or if he comes off looking like a jerk- Ms. O won't even give Vick a second thought. She will be long gone and looking for her next Dr. Phil or Rachael Ray.

Some things to hope for in the new year.

The new year isn't officially here yet, but I already have some things that I am hoping and wishing for in 2011:

I am hoping that governor Neil Abercombie of Hawaii will be successful in quieting these "birther" nut cases here in A-merry-ca, forever. Good luck with that Gov.; the mind of the wingnut does not work like us normal folks.

I am hoping that A-merry-cans will stop obsessing over "celebrities" in our culture and start paying more attention to the people who really matter in our society. We can start with folks like our parents, youth coaches, and teachers.

I am hoping that "7" will find true redemption on the football field, and that folks will shut up forever about his damn dogs.

And, speaking of Vick; here is hoping that wingnuts like Tucker Carlson find it in their Christian hearts to forgive.

"Fox News commentator Tucker Carlson followed the company's interesting tradition the other day by making one of the most distasteful and egregious comments in recent media history. Filling in for Sean Hannity, Carlson said that Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Michael Vick should have been executed for dogfighting.

"I'm a Christian, I've made mistakes myself, I believe fervently in second chances," Carlson said. "But Michael Vick killed dogs, and he did in a heartless and cruel way. And I think, personally, he should've been executed for that. He wasn't, but the idea that the President of the United States would be getting behind someone who murdered dogs? Kind of beyond the pale."

-Yes, and the idea that someone should be "executed" for killing a f&*^%$g dog is not?-

I am hoping that Ms. Thing gives black folks some shine on her new network. I mean how much more Rachael Rays and Doctor Phils can we take?

I am hoping that I am going to hear less of the word insurgents on the nightly news.

I am hoping that the authorities will find Jody Lynn Bennett. (No relation.) Tucker, who is worse? Jody Lynn Bennett, or Michael Vick?

"hand-held video game console and other items were stolen from the coffin of a teenager killed in a car crash on Christmas Day.
Jody Lynn Bennett, 38, of Mentcle, Pennsylvania, grabbed the items from the coffin of 17-year-old Bradley McCombs during a viewing on Monday night at a funeral home 65 miles northeast of Pittsburgh. State police have named the alleged suspect and said they were still searching for him this morning. "

Oh lawd!!

Finally, I wish that all of you Me-groes would stay out of A-merry-can politics. Charlie, Kwame, Larry, and Sheila; please don't let the door knob hit you where the good lord split you on your way out.

Sarah Vick?

I am totally hyped for my "birds" going into Big D this Sunday and taking on the Cowgals. Here is hoping that my main man, Michael Vick, chuck and ducks out another win for the birds. (Did I mention that I hate the Cowgals?)

Michael Vick is a perfect segue into my next post, because I want to talk about my girl Sarah Palin and an interesting double standard being played out in A-merry-ca.

Unless you have been living on another planet you know by now what Michael Vick was accused -and ultimately found guilty- of. He served two years and lost a hundred million dollars for his mistreatment of Fido. But thankfully, and with all due respect to F. Scott Fitzgerald, there are second acts in American lives. And Michael Vick is burning up the stage while he plays out his. But I digress.

Sarah Palin has been torturing animals and killing them for sport as well, and she is a hero to a lot of people here in A-merry-ca. Why? Where is the outrage for this heartless killer? Sadly, it took a Hollywood screenwriter to point out our willful hypocrisy:

Unless you've never worn leather shoes, sat upon a leather chair or eaten meat, save your condemnation."

You're right, Sarah, we'll all just go fuck ourselves now.

The snotty quote was posted by Sarah Palin on (like all the great frontier women who've come before her) her Facebook page to respond to the criticism she knew and hoped would be coming after she hunted, killed and carved up a Caribou during a segment of her truly awful reality show, Sarah Palin's Alaska, broadcast on The-Now-Hilariously-Titled Learning Channel.

I eat meat, chicken and fish, have shoes and furniture made of leather, and PETA is not ever going to put me on the cover of their brochure and for these reasons Palin thinks it's hypocritical of me to find what she did heart-stoppingly disgusting. I don't think it is, and here's why.

Like 95% of the people I know, I don't have a visceral (look it up) problem eating meat or wearing a belt. But like absolutely everybody I know, I don't relish the idea of torturing animals. I don't enjoy the fact that they're dead and I certainly don't want to volunteer to be the one to kill them and if I were picked to be the one to kill them in some kind of Lottery-from-Hell, I wouldn't do a little dance of joy while I was slicing the animal apart.

I'm able to make a distinction between you and me without feeling the least bit hypocritical. I don't watch snuff films and you make them. You weren't killing that animal for food or shelter or even fashion, you were killing it for fun. You enjoy killing animals. I can make the distinction between the two of us but I've tried and tried and for the life of me, I can't make a distinction between what you get paid to do and what Michael Vick went to prison for doing. I'm able to make the distinction with no pangs of hypocrisy even though I get happy every time one of you faux-macho shitheads accidentally shoots another one of you in the face." [Source]

I could not have said it better myself.